SUNRISE SALUTATION #63: The Sins Of The Father....Finding The Way Back Home To The True Foundations That Support Emotional Fulfillment

Early Rising Reflections And Downloads For A New Day With Solarah

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Cloudy days are for reflection, introspection, and integration….

As the Sun enters into the third decan of Cancer, Venus is making Her way into Leo, and the Moon begins Her transit through Libra. This is Four of Cups energy that the Sun will be illuminating for us over the next nine days.

The Four of Cups is an interesting card in the tarot because, while it depicts disappointment and dissatisfaction, it is also the card that charges us to take a deeper look at the old rejection and betrayal stories that have established patterns and programming that have been harming our ability to have emotional fulfillment. It is the energy that charges us to create new emotional foundations and patterning that support our joy and truth.

Although Cancer energy connects us deeply to our mother wound, in the third decan the door begins to open for us to explore the relational dynamic we had with our father’s, and whether their union with our mother’s - and their co-parenting efforts - supported the emotional stability our mother’s needed in order to properly show up for us, or if it led to their further dysfunction and destruction.

The truth is that many of us who were bullied or emotionally wounded by our mothers were only open to this kind of treatment because we had passive fathers, who were either afraid of the ones they sired children with, or couldn’t be bothered to extricate themselves from their work and other hobbies to do the true work of parenting.

Many held the belief that providing funds was their only fatherly duty, and they would therefore take a seat when it came to all other parental responsibilities. Some believed that their only job was to fertilise the egg and then scram. Little boys playing big man games…..refusing to take responsibility for the broken hearts and shattered lives that their decisions produced.

A father’s job is to protect his children at all costs - even from his own woundedness, and that of the partner he has chosen to procreate with. The false matrix distorted this role and its true responsibilities, by having many men abandon and outsource their true paternal authority to their partners, hired helpers/child care, and the schooling system.

A lot of the pain that women pass onto their own children is not only born of their own woundedness, but from the dysfunctional and complicated relationship they have with the child’s father. It took two to bring forth that life, and it takes two to properly cultivate the true foundations that child needs to thrive.

I grew up with two narcississtic parents - my mother overtly so, and my father covertly. I remember growing up and thinking that my father had it so bad to be married and tethered to her. I used to fantasize about them getting divorced, or him falling in love with my favourite babysitter, and us all starting a new life without my mother.

It took me a while to see that my mother’s abject hatred towards me was deeply rooted in the lack of real support she got from him in their co-parenting responsibilities.